geri_chan: (Snape)
geri_chan ([personal profile] geri_chan) wrote2008-03-16 11:40 am
Entry tags:

FIC: Homecoming

Title: Homecoming
Pairing: Snape/Lupin (implied)
Rating: PG
Word count: ~3045
Disclaimer: No money is being made off this story; consider it a little wish fulfillment on my part.

Summary: Written for the housewarming part to celebrate Snapedom's move to Insane Journal. Severus is offered the chance to return to Hogwarts after the war is over. Original post can be found on my IJ, but I'm also posting it here for those who prefer to read and comment on LJ.

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Severus had never expected to live through the war; he had been certain that one side or the other would kill him before it was over. In a way, he had almost been looking forward to the peace of death, and freedom from duty and guilt and manipulation. So he was shocked, and somewhat chagrined, to find himself not only alive after Voldemort's defeat, but also a free man, his name cleared by the testimony of Harry Potter and Dumbledore's portrait. So he found himself at a loss as to what he should do next.

McGonagall provided him with one possible option. The day after his name was officially cleared by the Ministry, she showed up on his doorstep at Spinner's End and humbly apologized for having doubted his loyalty, and for the way that she and the other teachers had attacked him at the castle.

"Everyone was meant to believe that I was a traitor; that was the whole point of Albus's carefully orchestrated deception, after all," Severus pointed out, but he did feel a secret sense of gratification at the apology--not that he would ever let her and the others know that their opinions mattered to him.

"I loved Albus dearly, but it is difficult to forgive him for the way that he treated you--and Mr. Potter as well," McGonagall said with a grimace. "He had a tendency to treat people as pawns on a chessboard rather than human beings."

"That is true," Severus acknowledged. "However, I at least willingly agreed to become his pawn, in penance for past sins."

McGonagall was not the type to be demonstrative with her affections, but she briefly laid her hand on his arm. Severus wasn't sure if he was more surprised at the gesture of sympathy or by the fact that he actually took a small measure of comfort from it.

"Whatever mistakes you might have made in the past, you have more than atoned for in my book," McGonagall said quietly.

"Thank you," Severus said hoarsely, finding it difficult to speak around the lump that seemed to have suddenly formed in his throat. Maybe it was due to his recently-healed wound, because surely he couldn't have been infected with sentimentality at this late point in his life.

"I have been appointed the new Headmistress of Hogwarts," McGonagall said, a bit uncomfortably.

"Congratulations," Severus said politely. McGonagall started to apologize again, but he interrupted her with a wry, only slightly bitter smile. "You need not apologize, Minerva; I did not expect to retain my position as Headmaster. I am lucky not to be in Azkaban."

"You deserve much more than an avoided prison sentence!" McGonagall said indignantly, although her anger seemed to be directed at the Ministry rather than at him. Her voice and expression softened slightly, and she added, "However, it is within my power to offer you the position of Potions Master and Deputy Headmaster. I am afraid that is all I can do for you, Severus, although you deserve so much more."

Severus was taken aback; he had not expected to be offered back his old position even after his name was cleared--it was actually even a promotion, because he didn't really consider his tenure as Headmaster under Voldemort's reign to be official. He really had killed Dumbledore, even if it was at the old man's behest, and he had assumed that the parents--and the school governors--would not want a murderer teaching their children. And many of the students and their parents would no doubt hold a grudge against him for allowing the Carrows to abuse the children, although he had done his best to restrain them without giving away his cover. Some of the students had suffered injuries, but none had been maimed or killed, and whenever possible, he had sentenced misbehaving students to "detention in the Forbidden Forest," which had sounded sufficiently ominous to the Carrows, who were too ignorant to realize that the "detention" would be nothing more taxing than tea and cookies in Hagrid's hut--although anyone eating Hagrid's cooking ran the risk of broken teeth, food poisoning, or both, so maybe it had been an appropriate punishment, after all.

"May I have some time to think about it?" Severus finally asked.

"Of course," McGonagall replied. "I would not blame you if you did not wish to return after the way we treated you. But everyone understands your true loyalties now, and we would like to have the chance to make it up to you, if you can find it in your heart to forgive us. I assure you that you would be welcomed as a valued and respected member of the staff."

It was the most humble speech he had ever heard the proud Head of Gryffindor make, and Severus replied sincerely, "Thank you, Minerva; I appreciate the offer. I will think it over and let you know my decision."

But although he appreciated the apology and the offer of a job, he was still undecided as to whether he should accept the latter. He believed that McGonagall was sincere, but did the rest of the staff really want him back? He had never been very popular even before his loyalty had been called into question, and how many of them would resent him for killing Dumbledore and for failing to save Charity Burbage?

And although he had tried to protect the students as best he could, he was not sure if they understood that. Although he had reigned in the worst excesses of the Carrows, the students had still suffered, and many of them would probably hate him for that.

Severus let out a little snort of bitter amusement. Being hated by the students--and some of his fellow teachers, too--was nothing new. Since when did he care about the opinion of a bunch of unruly brats?

But still, he found himself unable to make a decision, until Remus Lupin came to see him a few days after McGonagall's visit.

"To what do I owe the pleasure, Lupin?" Severus drawled sarcastically as he admitted the werewolf into his sitting room. He was filled with a mixture of resentment that Lupin had so quickly believed him to be a traitor; anger that he cared what Lupin thought of him; and a secret sense of relief that Lupin had managed to survive the war. Unfortunately, so had his silly pink-haired chit of a wife, although some idiot had prematurely proclaimed them both dead when they had actually only been knocked unconscious.

"For one thing, I wished to apologize for doubting you, Severus," Lupin said quietly. "After all you'd done for the Order, after all you'd done for me, brewing the Wolfsbane even though you hated me, I should at least have considered that things weren't what they seemed. Especially after the way Sirius was framed for Wormtail's crimes. I made the same mistake twice, and I am truly sorry, Severus, although I know that an apology does not make up for my lack of faith."

"Fine, you've made your apology and soothed your Gryffindor conscience," Severus sneered, not quite willing to let Lupin off the hook just yet. Lupin's lack of faith had hurt more than any of his other colleagues' had, for reasons that Severus did not want to admit, even to himself. "Was there something else?"

"Yes," Lupin replied. "I know that Minerva offered you the position of Deputy Headmaster, and you have not accepted it yet. I was hoping that I could convince you to return to Hogwarts."

"And why is this any of your concern?" Severus demanded. "You aren't a member of the faculty...oh. Don't tell me that McGonagall offered you your old job back, too?"

"Yes, although I fear that is hardly an incentive for you to return," Lupin said, smiling sadly. "More like the opposite. But I hope you will return in spite of whatever differences we might have."

"Now I understand why you want me to come back," Severus said bitterly. "You need someone to brew the Wolfsbane for you, right?"

But to his surprise, Lupin shook his head. "No, the Ministry is funding a clinic that will provide the Wolfsbane for free to any werewolf who needs it--one of the new laws that Kingsley pushed through, along with the repeal of the werewolf employment restrictions."

"Oh," Severus said weakly, feeling rather deflated. "Then why...?"

Lupin smiled at him, a genuine smile this time. "Because it is your right, and I do not want to see you driven away by the fools who still do not believe the truth and cannot comprehend the magnitude of your sacrifice. Because the students would benefit from your example of bravery and loyalty. Because Slytherin House is in chaos, and the students need someone to guide them, someone who understands and cares about them. And...this is a rather selfish reason, but I would like to work alongside you once again. I have always liked and respected you, Severus, although I know that you don't believe me. I was too cowardly to stand up to James and the others when we were students, but I hope that I can earn your respect now that we are adults, and hopefully will be colleagues."

"You'll have to work at it, Lupin," Severus retorted.

Lupin looked hopeful rather than offended, and Severus realized that his careless insult implied that he and Lupin would be working together. "I will, Severus," Lupin said earnestly.

"I haven't made up my mind about the job yet," Severus hedged.

"Well, I hope to see you at Hogwarts soon," Lupin said pleasantly.

"Will Miss Tonks--or rather, Mrs. Lupin and your son be moving into the castle with you?" Severus asked in what he hoped was an offhand manner. "Or will you be commuting to the school?"

"Teddy and I will be moving into the castle," Lupin replied in a voice that sounded as falsely casual as Severus's felt. "Dora and I have just gotten a divorce--we signed the official papers this morning, as a matter of fact."

Severus was too stunned to speak and just stood there like a fool with his mouth hanging open. Lupin, ever polite, pretended not to notice, and continued calmly, "You see, we discovered that we really didn't suit each other. It was infatuation on her part, and cowardice on mine. With everyone pressuring us to get together after...after Albus died, with the misguided notion of creating a happy ending in the midst of tragedy, I let myself be talked into something that I knew was a mistake."

Lupin's voice faltered briefly in the middle of the sentence, giving the impression that he had started to say something else and then changed his mind. But if Dumbledore's death had not been the motive behind Lupin's ill-fated marriage, what else could it have been...surely not Severus's betrayal? That would imply that the werewolf had feelings for him, which was ridiculous. Just as ridiculous as the inexplicable surge of hope and glee he had felt upon hearing that Lupin was getting divorced.

"It's an amicable split," Lupin explained. "We're sharing custody of Teddy; we agreed that it's important for him to have both parents in his life even if they're no longer married to each other. He'll be living with me at Hogwarts for the most part, since my work schedule is more stable than Dora's at the moment."

Severus feigned a yawn. "You seem to be under the mistaken impression that I am interested in the mundane details of your personal life, Lupin."

"I beg your pardon for burdening you with my mundane trivialities, Severus," Lupin said with an impish little smile that made him look years younger, despite the gray in his hair. "However, in my defense, you did ask me about Dora and Teddy, so I was just answering your question, although perhaps I was a bit long-winded about it."

"So I did," Severus acknowledged. "Well, I suppose I have no one but myself to blame for striking up a conversation with a loquacious Gryffindor."

"And about the job...?" Lupin prompted.

"I will let Professor McGonagall know of my decision by the end of the week," Severus said, and Lupin took his leave, although he looked disappointed by Severus's reply.
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In the end, Severus decided to accept the job. There were a number of factors that went into his decision: the lack of any other job offers, for one thing, and the fact that Lupin finally seemed to have grown a spine held the potential for...well, a cordial working relationship, at least. And besides, he rationalized, someone had to monitor Lupin's son to see if he developed his father's lycanthropy, and be there to deal with the consequences if necessary. Brewing the Wolfsbane for a child was a complicated matter--the dosage had to be weaker than it would be for an adult, but not so weak as to be ineffective.

But what truly made up his mind was the fact that Hogwarts had been his home for most of his life, and there was really no where else that he wanted to go. The house at Spinner's End had never really been "home" to him; the memories it held for him were all unpleasant. His memories of Hogwarts were mixed, but for a magical child growing up in the Muggle world, it had been the first place where he had felt like he had truly belonged.
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There were only a couple of weeks left of school by the time Severus rejoined the staff, but McGonagall insisted that he resume his job immediately rather than waiting for the new term in the fall.

"I would like to welcome two additions to the staff," McGonagall announced during breakfast in the Great Hall on the first day of Severus's return. "First of all, Eve Summers will be the new Muggle Studies Professor." There was a smattering of polite applause as the new teacher--a young half-blood woman who had been a student herself not so long ago--briefly stood and inclined her head in acknowledgment.

"And I would also like to welcome back Professor Snape, who will be resuming his position as Potions Master and Head of Slytherin, as well as taking on the duties of Deputy Headmaster," McGonagall continued.

A hush fell over the room; the students didn't seem to know how to react, and there was no sound save the faint rustling of their robes as they shifted in their seats uneasily. As if to start things off, Lupin began to applaud, and Teddy, who was sitting in a high chair next to his father, gurgled happily and clapped his hands together in imitation. The other teachers joined in, but although they were applauding with all apparent sincerity and enthusiasm, the sound still seemed thin and hollow in the cavernous hall.

And then, at the Slytherin table, Theodore Nott rose to his feet and began applauding almost defiantly. Severus was startled by the gesture of support, although he knew that Theodore had fought in the Battle of Hogwarts on the side of the Order. His father had been a loyal Death Eater, but the elder Nott had been slain by an irate Dark Lord for calling in a false Harry Potter sighting. Theodore had already lost his mother to illness as a child, and his father's murder had been the catalyst to turn him against the Death Eaters.

Some of the Order members had been surprised by the number of Slytherin students who had turned against Voldemort, but Severus was not. The Dark Lord had been a brutal ruler, using force and threats and torture to keep his followers in line, so it was no surprise that many of his followers had chosen to defect.

Severus hadn't been sure how his Slytherins would react to his return. He had assumed that the ones whose families had remained loyal to Voldemort would despise him for turning traitor, and even the ones who had fought against Voldemort might still hate him for the things he had done while pretending to be the Dark Lord's faithful servant, for failing to protect them and their families.

After a moment, Blaise Zabini stood up and joined in the applause. Blaise and his mother had remained carefully neutral after the Dark Lord's return, but when Theodore had chosen to fight, Blaise had chosen to fight by his best friend's side.

Draco had been sitting quietly at the table, looking pale and subdued, but now he pushed back his chair and rose to his feet, and began applauding. Across the room, his eyes met Severus's, conveying a look of gratitude, and his lips silently mouthed the words, "Thank you."

Goyle, still looking shaken by the death of Crabbe and his own narrow escape, followed Draco's lead and joined in the applause. One by one, the Slytherins rose to their feet and applauded, even Pansy Parkinson, who had very vocally advocated turning Potter over to the Dark Lord, or so Severus had been told. But maybe she had been motivated by fear more than shared ideology with the Death Eaters, because she looked relieved and grateful to be back in school with things returned to normal.

The applause was growing louder, and Severus noticed that Potter, Weasley, and Granger must have stood up and begun clapping while he was distracted by the Slytherins. The other Gryffindors looked uncertain, but then Longbottom joined in, and so did Ginny Weasley, and eventually the rest of the table followed.

Luna Lovegood was already on her feet, applauding, and when Severus looked her way, she nodded and gave him a solemn smile. The rest of the Ravenclaws soon joined in, and so did the Hufflepuffs, until the Great Hall echoed with the thunderous sound of their applause.

Severus felt tears sting his eyes, and Lupin reached over and laid his hand over Severus's. The gesture was strangely comforting, and gave him enough strength to keep the tears in check and not break down and weep in front of the entire school.

"Welcome home, Severus," Lupin said softly, smiling at him warmly.

THE END.

[identity profile] poppyfields13.livejournal.com 2008-03-16 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
aw, i luved that. it was really good. ♥

[identity profile] geri-chan.livejournal.com 2008-03-17 03:34 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

Wonderful!

[identity profile] lapu-lapu.livejournal.com 2008-03-17 02:40 am (UTC)(link)
That was great. I was hoping the book would end that way. Thank you for writing it down.

Re: Wonderful!

[identity profile] geri-chan.livejournal.com 2008-03-17 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you liked it! I did sort of feel that Snape got cheated in the book, so I enjoyed giving him a happier ending.

[identity profile] bohemianspirit.livejournal.com 2008-03-19 12:14 am (UTC)(link)
That was awesome. ;-) I really like how you write Severus and Remus. I read it from my cell phone, so am only now getting around to commenting on it. Actually, I read most of what you post, but most of the time forget to find the posts and comment on them by the time I get to a computer. :-P Alas... I can't wait till I'm online at home, again!

BTW, in response to a comment you made on Snapedom some months back, I'm not picky about whether stories are slash or het; I care more that the relationships are healthy and that the writing is good and that the story is basically positive, and even if it deals with some "dark" circumstances or factors, it is not fundamentally "dark," if you know what I mean. So I cheerfully read your Snupin fics, even though I think canonically Severus was almost certainly straight, not bi or gay, because there's enough room for poetic license on that point. I will NOT (for example) read fics portraying him as a torturing molestor of students; totally NOT in-character, by any stretch of the imagination.

And Remus is gay in my Severus Evans series ;-) even if Severus is straight, but they ARE best friends, so there's always potential... at least for subtext, denial, and unrequited affections. Hee hee.

[identity profile] geri-chan.livejournal.com 2008-03-19 08:54 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you, I'm glad you liked the fic!

I used to only read Snupin, but I'm beginning to branch out a bit, although that's still my OTP. That's one of the nice things about Snapedom, getting recs for fics I normally would never have heard of. I agree that how the relationship is portrayed makes a big difference; I read one Snupin story where Lupin was seeing Snape on the side but refused to leave Tonks, and it broke my heart, while on the other hand, I've read some sweet and tender Snape/Luna drabbles by Bluestocking79 that I loved, even though I never in a million years would have imagined them to be a compatible pairing.

Your gay Lupin sounds intriguing, so I must go take a look at your series! ^_^

[identity profile] bohemianspirit.livejournal.com 2008-03-20 11:46 pm (UTC)(link)
I think I've liked every one of your fics that I've read. When I get online at home, I plan to look up your archives and read them all!

Your gay Lupin sounds intriguing, so I must go take a look at your series! ^_^

Here's the link: Severus Evans: An Alternative Life of Severus Snape (http://severus-evans.insanejournal.com/). It's on IJ.

Remus doesn't appear in every chapter, but he ends up becoming Severus' best friend as a result of events when they are in sixth year (the prologue), and as best friends, there is ongoing teasing and perhaps a bit of subtextual tension ;-) and certainly there is genuine affection and love between the two, so I think you will enjoy reading. If you share the view that canon Dumbledore turned out to be a Manipulative Rat Bastard, you will enjoy the story even more. I think I like your version of Dumbledore much better, but in my AU, at least, Severus holds his own in spite of Dumbles' machinations.

For some reason I had been thinking you were following it all along, but there are so many familiar names from Snapedom commenting on the series that I think I just got mixed up. ;-)