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FIC: Phoenix Rising, Part 36 of 37
Title: Phoenix Rising, Part 36 of 37
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Snape/Lupin
Word count: ~7,670
Warning: AU; my own version of Year 6 (was written pre-HBP).
Author's notes: {} Indicates character's unspoken thought
Disclaimer: No money is being made off this story; consider it a little wish fulfillment on my part.
Sequel to: Always (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6), Summer Vacation (Part 1, Part 2), For Old Time's Sake (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5), Three's a Crowd (or, Summer Vacation II) (Part 1, Part 2), Return of the Raven (Part 1, Part 2), Phoenix Reborn (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8)
Summary: Lupin, Snape, and Branwen try to help their students cope with troubled emotions following the final battle.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26, Part 27, Part 28, Part 29, Part 30, Part 31, Part 32, Part 33, Part 34, Part 35
***
In the morning, they had to deal with all the things they had postponed, and were kept busy answering the Ministry's questions and dealing with parents demanding to see their children and wanting to know how Death Eaters had managed to get onto the campus. Somewhat to Snape's surprise, Mrs. Crabbe and Mrs. Goyle were among them, and actually looked relieved to see that their children were safe. He watched in amazement as they hugged their sons, although they had never shown much affection for their children in the past. Would wonders never cease? Delia Avery had finally grown a spine and stood up to her husband; Lupin had won over Draco's loyal cronies; and now Mrs. Crabbe and Mrs. Goyle had turned into loving mothers. Well, while they were annoying and overbearing at times, they had never joined the Death Eaters like their husbands, so perhaps they weren't all that bad, and now that they had nearly lost their their sons, maybe they would appreciate them more. Lupin walked in on the middle of their conversation and cheerfully told them how Crabbe and Goyle had saved him from the Dementor on the battlefield and that they should be very proud of their sons. Snape had to bite his lip to keep from laughing as the two women stared in shock, looking absolutely dumbfounded as their sons beamed happily at their werewolf teacher.
Snape and Lupin were too busy to eat breakfast or lunch in the Great Hall--in fact, they barely had time to eat at all, grabbing a quick bite here and there in between talking to the Ministry officials and fending off worried parents--but they did make it down to the Hall for dinner. Lupin still looked tired and drained, the result of having transformed unexpectedly without the benefit of the Wolfsbane Potion, and he looked up at Snape as they approached the entrance to the Great Hall, an unspoken question in his eyes. Snape knew what Lupin wanted, and he also knew that Lupin would not hold it against him, would not utter one word of rebuke if Snape chose to ignore his silent request. But Lupin looked so weary and so wistful that he could not bear to deny his lover what he wanted. After all, he owed Lupin a great deal for the way he had hurt him in the past, and had he not once promised Lupin, "When the war is over, I will gladly tell the world that you are my lover"? So he silently held his arm out to Lupin as they entered the Hall. Lupin's eyes widened, then he smiled and took Snape's arm, leaning on him for support as they walked in together and took their seats at the head table. All the teachers except for Dumbledore and Branwen stared at them in astonishment, their jaws hanging open. An excited buzz of conversation broke out all over the room from the students' tables.
Lupin grinned at Snape, the weariness in his eyes retreating for a moment to be replaced by a mischievous gleam. "Shall we really give them something to gossip about, Severus?"
"Are you referring to your threat to 'snog you at the head table in front of the entire school,' I believe were your exact words?" Snape asked in his usual sarcastic voice.
"Suh...suh...suh...snog?" gasped a shocked and horrified Hagrid as he overheard Snape's remark. Both Lupin and Snape ignored him.
"Yes, Sev," Lupin replied with a grin.
Snape heaved an exaggerated, long-suffering sigh, and replied, "If you must. Although I think you should learn to curb these exhibitionist tendencies of--"
And the Hall echoed with a great, combined shriek of surprise from the assembled teachers and students as Lupin cut off Snape's words with a firm kiss.
***
When the commotion finally died down, Dumbledore explained to the students the events of the previous night, and praised the bravery of everyone involved, and made a point of noting that they had prevailed because everyone--human and non-human; Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff--had united and worked together for the common good. He raised his glass and said a toast to those who had fought, then asked for a moment of silence for those who had died. He ended his speech on that solemn note, and the meal commenced, in a much more subdued manner.
The Potions Master's pale face remained a little red for the rest of the evening, and he spent most of the meal trying to scowl viciously at the teachers and students who kept casting him sidelong glances of disbelief. But the scowl tended to slip and the corners of his mouth would twitch, threatening to turn into a smile every time he looked at Lupin, who looked radiantly happy and just a little smug. Dumbledore and Branwen, of course, looked EXTREMELY smug and pleased with themselves whenever they looked at the happy couple. Even Sirius, who was sitting at the head table as a guest that night, smiled a little at them. He was not quite sure when he had stopped hating Snape, although he supposed the process had started that day near the end of summer, when he had realized how much Snape cared for Dylan, and when he had finally acknowledged to himself the real reasons he had sent Snape to the Shrieking Shack back in fifth year. He wasn't sure if he and Snape would ever actually be friends, but he supposed that they would learn to get along with each other for Moony's and Branwen's sakes. Branwen adored the slimy git--and Sirius supposed he should be grateful for her capacity for affection, since it also enabled her to love a thick-witted, stubborn, hotheaded Gryffindor git as well. Besides, he had to admit that his main objection to Lupin's and Snape's relationship--his fear that Snape would hurt Remus--no longer applied, because it was clear from that little display of affection that Remy had the Potions Master wrapped around his little finger; he could never in a million years have imagined that Snape would ever let Lupin kiss him and embarrass him in front of the entire school, but he had.
***
Later that night, Snape and Lupin lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. "Sev?" Lupin asked.
"Hmm?"
"Can't sleep?"
"No."
"Me neither. And I imagine there a lot of children lying awake in Slytherin right now, too."
"You're probably right," Snape said.
"Well?" Lupin said expectantly. "Don't you think we should do something about that? You are their Head of House."
"And what would you like me to do, Lupin?" Snape asked sarcastically. "Take them some hot milk, tell them a story, and tuck them into bed?"
"Something like that," Lupin replied with a straight face, "although I was thinking hot chocolate instead of plain milk."
Snape laughed and gave in. "Aren't you worried about the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, and Hufflepuffs as well?"
"Yes, but they have their own Heads of House to look after them," Lupin said, looking serious now. "And besides, it was Slytherin that suffered the most losses in this war. We now have two children who are orphans, two who have lost their fathers, and two whose fathers are back in prison. And many of the others probably have families who sympathized with the Death Eaters. However much they feared the Death Eaters, a part of them must have been drawn to the promise of power, the promise to make Slytherin the greatest of all the Houses, instead of one despised and mistrusted. They will need comfort, Severus, and reassurance."
"Very well," Snape sighed. "But you have to come with me; I'm not very good at comforting children."
"You did well enough with Dylan," Lupin said with a smile. "But of course I'll come with you, since you're not ashamed to be seen with me anymore," Lupin teased.
"I'll have you know, Lupin," Snape complained, "that you're utterly destroying my reputation."
"Poor baby," Lupin said, kissing his cheek.
"Cut that out!"
"You don't want me to kiss you?" Lupin asked innocently.
"I don't want you to call me 'poor baby'!" Snape huffed. "And don't play dumb with me!"
Lupin laughed and hugged him. "I love you when you're grumpy, Sev," he said fondly.
"Well, good," Snape grumbled, "since that's my normal mood."
"I love you all the time, Severus," Lupin said tenderly. "Grumpy or cheerful, compassionate or bitter. I love you always, every part of you."
"Hmmph," Snape snorted as he blushed. Then he kissed Lupin and said, "I love you, too, you irritating little werewolf. Come on, let's go comfort the brats." They climbed out of bed and got dressed, and before they left, Snape paused to put on both his serpent bracelet and the serpent ring Lupin had given him for Christmas.
Lupin smiled when he saw Severus put on the ring, and when he saw that Severus had put the bracelet on over the sleeve of his robe instead of under it. Although he put up with Lupin's "exhibitionist tendencies," Snape was not inclined to be demonstrative with his affection in public, so Lupin was touched by what he knew was Severus's way of openly declaring his love for Lupin.
Snape saw Lupin's smile and said gruffly, "Well, there's no point in hiding it anymore after tonight, is there? Besides, there's not really any need to hide it now that the Dark Lord--now that Voldemort's dead."
Lupin kissed him again, and pulled out the quartz good-luck charm--the first gift he had ever received from Severus, back in fifth year--that he usually wore hidden beneath his robes, and let it rest on his chest. "You're right, Sev; no point in hiding it." He sighed happily. "I've been waiting over twenty years for the chance to wear this openly."
Snape blinked back tears at the sight of the childish gift Lupin had kept and cherished during all the years they'd been apart. He reached out with one finger and traced the rune carved into the smooth surface of the stone; Lupin caught Snape's hand, lifted it to his lips, and kissed his fingertips. Speechless for a moment, Snape let his fingers gently trace the curve of Lupin's lips, then cleared his throat and said, "We should get going." Lupin smiled and nodded.
They made a brief detour to the kitchen, then entered the Slytherin dorm followed by house-elves carrying trays laden with mugs of hot cocoa. Although it was after lights-out, there were a number of children sitting in the common room, looking anxious, haunted, shell-shocked, or all of the above. All of the children who had been on the battlefield were among them.
"Professor!" Dylan exclaimed.
Snape looked as though he didn't know what to say, so Lupin smiled and said, "We couldn't sleep tonight, and clearly you can't, either, so I thought we might as well all stay awake together." The elves began distributing the mugs of cocoa, and soon the rest of the children were coming out into the common room to see what was going on. When all the mugs had been passed out, the house-elves left, and Lupin and Snape took seats on the couch, holding their own mugs. Dylan came over and sat beside Snape, and after a moment, Damien followed. The other children cautiously began to approach; Snape was not surprised to see that most of them congregated around Lupin rather than himself: Theodore and Blaise hesitantly sat on Lupin's side of the couch, and Crabbe, Goyle, and Doherty curled up on the floor at his feet like a pack of puppies. The other children found seats on the floor or on the other chairs. Draco hung back a little, standing in front of the fireplace.
They sipped their chocolate in silence together for a few minutes, then finally Damien worked up enough courage to ask, "Um, sir? When did you and Professor Lupin, ah, um..."
Snape looked over at Lupin. "I'll let you handle that, Lupin, since the public display of affection was your idea," he said in a slightly sarcastic tone.
Lupin just grinned. "Actually, we first got together back in fifth year, during Professor Blackmore's class. She's always been big on inter-House cooperation."
Damien choked on his chocolate. "What?!"
Lupin laughed. "Yes, Dylan's parents weren't the only ones to discover romance in her class!"
"Th-then all these y-years, the two of you...?" Brad Doherty stammered.
Lupin's expression turned sober. "Not exactly. I've always cared for Severus, but..." He and Snape exchanged a significant glance. "But our relationship could not withstand the pressures of the House rivalries. My Gryffindor friends objected to my friendship with Severus and...ah...set into motion a misunderstanding that caused us to quarrel and separate for eighteen years."
"To be fair," Snape admitted reluctantly, "the quarrel was one-sided. You tried to apologize to me, but I would not listen."
"I didn't try hard enough to get you back," Lupin replied, looking a little guilty. "I was too afraid of losing my other friends." He smiled sadly at the Slytherins. "You see, if I lost both Severus and my Gryffindor friends, then I would be completely alone. It's not easy for a werewolf to make friends." He smile grew a little warmer as he added, "At least back then. I'm very happy that so many of you have welcomed me as your teacher in spite of my lycanthropy." He smiled in particular at Crabbe, Goyle, and Brad. "In fact, I owe my life to you three. In all the excitement, I never got a chance to thank you, so I would like to thank you now. Thank you very much, Vincent, Gregory, Brad." The three boys beamed up at him with sheer devotion in their eyes, enhancing Snape's mental image of them as puppies, and he had to duck his head to hide his smile.
Meanwhile, Theodore was busy doing math in his head. "Eighteen years...that means, when you came to Hogwarts during our third year..."
"Very good, Theo," Lupin laughed. "Five points to Slytherin! Yes, Severus and I renewed our...er...friendship...that year."
"But Professor Snape got you fired!" Draco exclaimed.
"Well, there was another, um, misunderstanding," Lupin said.
"Sirius Black," Dylan said quietly. "You believed he really was a murderer, like everyone else did at the time, and you thought Professor Lupin had helped him get into Hogwarts."
"Perceptive as always, Mr. Rosier," Snape sighed. Of course, Dylan was the only one of the children who knew just how much he had hated Black. "But I was wrong. About Black being a murderer, and about Lupin helping him."
"We made up," Lupin explained, "but I still had to leave the school, until Albus convinced the school governors to let me come back this year."
"But you acted like you hated each other!" Goyle said, sounding bewildered.
"Use your brain, you dolt!" Theodore snapped. "A Death Eater couldn't have a relationship with a Gryffindor! They had to pretend..." His voice trailed off as the implication of his own words sank in. "But then...that means..." He looked at his Head of House with wide eyes. "You weren't really a Death Eater!" He asked timidly, "Were...were you ever really one of them, or were you working for Dumbledore the whole time?"
Draco cautiously crept forward; he very much wanted to know the answer to that question, too.
"At first I was," Snape admitted. He really didn't want to confess his shame to his students, but he felt that they deserved to know the truth, particularly the Death Eater offspring; he was quite aware of Draco listening intently behind him. "I wanted to learn all the things about the Dark Arts that Hogwarts refuses to teach, and I wanted revenge on Lupin's Gryffindor friends for humiliating me." He hesitated; well, he had just resolved to tell the truth... "And for coming between us. But on the night I took the Dark Mark, they executed a man before my eyes, killed him in a Blood Magic ritual, and I knew I had gotten in over my head. I told the Headmaster what I had done, and instead of calling in the Aurors to arrest me, he asked me to spy for him, and I agreed."
"To keep from being sent to Azkaban?" Draco demanded.
"No, Draco," Snape replied, without any anger, although most his students were watching him nervously, obviously expecting him to chew out Draco, if not strike him down on the spot. "I feared my Master's wrath far more than I feared prison or even death. I did it to atone for my own stupidity, and my part in that man's death."
"You spied on us all these years," Draco said, still sounding angry and hurt, but there was a pleading look in his eyes. "You pretended to be my father's friend. You pretended to be my friend."
"He was trying to save you, Draco," Lupin said gently.
"Save me from what?!"
"From being served up to the Dark Lord on a platter!" Theodore snarled. "Isn't it obvious? Our precious Master was ready to sacrifice us all last night!"
"I was trying to save you from making the same mistakes I did, Draco," Snape said wearily, "and living with a lifetime of guilt." Draco fell silent. "And I was trying to save you from suffering the fate of Dylan's father, who died for a Master who cared nothing for him. And yes, I was trying to save you from being killed, as Theodore nearly was last night. The Dark Lord claimed we were his family, but he used us like pawns on a chessboard, and sacrificed us just as easily as one would a chess piece. You saw the reward the Lestranges reaped, and they were the most loyal of all his followers."
"I'm sorry," Draco whispered, and he began to tremble a little. "My father told me not to trust you, but he turned out to be the one I couldn't trust."
Lupin reached out to lay a hand on Draco's shoulder. "It's all right, Draco. It's only natural to want to believe in your parents. It's not your fault that your father betrayed your trust."
"Why did you keep trying to help me even when I kept insulting you?" Draco asked him. "Sirius Black said you thought I was worth saving. What made you think that I wouldn't turn out to be like..." He had meant to say, "my dad," but he choked on the words, and changed them to, "...like the other Death Eaters?"
"Because you loved your parents," Lupin answered in a gentle voice. "And someone who is capable of such love cannot be completely evil. Voldemort always thought that love was a weakness, but he was wrong: love is the greatest strength we possess."
Draco sniffled a little and blinked back tears. He abruptly came around to the front of the couch, and joined Crabbe and Goyle on the floor in front of Lupin and Snape. Serafina came over and sat beside him, and he gave her a small, tremulous smile.
Suddenly, the students seemed to have overcome their shock and their fear of Snape, because they were all asking questions at once:
"How did you keep the Death Eaters from finding out you were a spy?"
"Did they ever suspect you, sir?"
"Professor Lupin, what did you do all the time you were gone from Hogwarts?"
"How did you turn into a wolf when it wasn't the full moon?"
"Will you tell us more about your werewolf ancestors?"
"One at a time," Lupin laughed.
So they kept talking late into the night, until all the mugs were empty, and the children were yawning and starting to doze off. Dylan was nodding off on Snape's shoulder, and Crabbe and Goyle were already curled up on the floor, snoring.
"Bedtime," Lupin said softly, and they sent the children off to their rooms. Dylan woke up enough to get back to his room on his own feet, but Crabbe and Goyle were soundly asleep and could not be roused.
"Maybe we should just leave them here," Snape suggested.
"You can't let them sleep on the floor!" Lupin said indignantly.
"Oh, very well," Snape sighed. He took out his wand and levitated them to their room. "But you can tuck them into bed, since it was your idea!"
"Very well," Lupin said with a smile, and he did.
***
Things were very hectic in the following week; the Minister of Magic was dead, and a new Minister needed to be selected. The position was offered to Dumbledore, who turned it down, of course, but suggested an alternate candidate: Arthur Weasley. The Ministry officials were shocked by this, but the Aurors who had fought on the battlefield had been impressed by Arthur's courage as he had fought alongside them, and by the way he had kept his head afterwards, calmly and efficiently overseeing the roundup of the prisoners and the evacuation of the wounded. So a stunned Arthur Weasley found himself the new Minister of Magic; he was a bit overwhelmed and tempted to turn down the position, but the look of pride on his wife's and children's faces made him change his mind. He didn't care about the rank or the increase in pay, but things had been difficult for Molly over the years, and he wanted to make it up to her. Besides, as Dumbledore pointed out to him, he would be in a position to do some good in the wizarding world.
Even before Arthur was appointed the new Minister of Magic, Percy made peace with his family. He finally understood that his father had been right all along about Harry Potter and Voldemort, and he was touched by the way the twins had rushed to his rescue, nearly getting themselves killed in the process. And his brothers and sister forgave him for the way he had snubbed them the other year, impressed by the way he had fought off an Imperius Curse to set off the firecracker warning. Fred and George were quite pleased that their new fireworks had been used as a warning signal--and by the fact that it provided some positive publicity for their shop. Molly, of course, was simply relieved and overjoyed to have her family together again.
The Longbottom family also had a happy reunion: Neville's parents were suddenly thinking and speaking coherently again--perhaps the result of the deaths of Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange. Often the effects of a curse were broken by the death of the caster, the way the Dark Mark had vanished from the arms of the Death Eaters after Voldemort died. The Longbottoms remembered almost nothing that happened after the attack; the past fifteen years they had spent in St. Mungo's were a blur to them, so they were more than a little surprised to find that their baby boy was now a teenager, but they embraced him with tears of sorrow and joy.
The surviving Death Eaters were sentenced to prison terms in Azkaban, except for Narcissa Malfoy and Delia Avery, who were granted probation because they had fought against their fellow Death Eaters in the end. That was a relief to Snape, who already had two orphaned Slytherins to worry about; Dylan had Math and Goewin, of course, but he wasn't sure if Theodore Nott had any relatives who were willing to look after him, or if those relatives were people who could be entrusted with a child's care. Rabastan Lestrange was still at large, and the Aurors were hunting for him, but no one considered him that much of a threat now that Voldemort was dead and all the other Death Eaters were imprisoned.
Meanwhile, the giants signed a peace treaty with the wizards. There was some grumbling about that, but Dumbledore pointed out that the new Gurg, Grawp, had saved the lives of Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and the grumbling ceased, or at least was toned down to a mutter. The centaurs still wanted nothing to do with the humans; they had fought simply to avenge their slain kinsfolk, they said haughtily, and retreated back to the Forest. They accepted Firenze back into their ranks, though, and the centaur resigned his position at Hogwarts, leaving Professor Trelawney the sole Divination teacher once again. Snape muttered that they ought to look into hiring Miyako Kamiyama when she graduated from school; she certainly had a higher success rate than Trelawney.
The new Minister of Magic also pushed through a new law giving non-humans equal rights. This was accomplished with some help from Rita Skeeter, who wrote up a glowing account of how the werewolves had "fought heroically, risking their lives to aid the very people who had treated them as outcasts and second-class citizens."
"Well, actually, we just wanted to avenge the death of our friend," Lukas said with an amused smile as he read the Daily Prophet one morning; Lupin had invited him to Hogwarts to give him the good news, and they were having breakfast together in Snape's quarters--well, Lupin's and Snape's quarters now. After having gone public with their relationship, there didn't seem to be any point in Lupin keeping his own rooms, since he spent nearly all of his time in Snape's. So he happily and openly moved into Snape's dungeon quarters. The Slytherin children were delighted to have him in the dungeon; in their eyes, it served to make him one of their own, a sort of unofficial Slytherin even though he was a Gryffindor. Lupin looked around the room which was now truly his, and at his lover, who was sipping a cup of coffee with a rather sour expression on his face, and was filled with a sense of contentment. It took him a moment to realize that Lukas was speaking, and he had not heard a word that his friend had said.
"Earth to Remus," Lukas said, waving a hand in front of his face.
"Oh, sorry!" Lupin said. "I was just...er...ruminating, I suppose."
Lukas grinned, giving Lupin a sly look. "You looked as smug as a cat licking cream from its whiskers! Anyway, what I said was, how on earth did you get the Skeeter woman to give us a positive write-up? Her style is more tearing people down than building them up."
Lupin grinned. "It wasn't me; it was Hermione. She arranged for Rita to get an exclusive interview with Harry in exchange for a few articles like this one. She also seems to have some kind of hold over the woman that I don't quite understand, almost as if she's blackmailing Rita."
"Hmm," Snape said thoughtfully, "she's not as much of a goody-two-shoes as I thought. Maybe she would have made a good Slytherin after all..."
"There's a sidebar here about the Wolfsbane Potion," Lukas said. "All about how werewolves are perfectly safe when they take it, and apparently the Ministry is expanding the distribution program--thanks to Arthur, no doubt." Then his eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You helped invent the potion, Snape?! I didn't know that!"
"What?!" Snape exclaimed. "Did that little brat tell the Skeeter woman that?!"
"No," Lukas said, reading further. "It was your partner, Kamiyama. He says that he felt guilty about taking the credit for it all these years, and he wanted to see you get the acknowledgment you deserve." Lukas grinned, exposing his sharp canines. "He makes you out to be quite the hero, Severus. He says you kept your role in the development of the Wolfsbane Potion secret so as not to jeopardize your ability to spy on the Death Eaters."
"Meddling old wizards," Snape mumbled as he flushed slightly.
"You ARE a hero, Sev," Lupin said, kissing him on the cheek. "I think the whole world should know that!"
Snape's face turned even more red as he glared at Lupin for kissing him in front of the other werewolf. "Most people probably think I only turned on Voldemort to save my own skin."
"Well, this article hints that you developed the potion out of affection for a certain werewolf," Lukas said, still grinning.
"WHAT?!" Snape howled. "Who told her that?! It must be one of the students! When I find out which brat it was, I'll--"
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Severus," Lupin interrupted, "I'm sure half the wizarding world must know by now. After we kissed at the head table--"
"You kissed me," Snape corrected him.
"--I'm sure many of the students owled their parents with the shocking news," Lupin continued calmly. "And they in turn spread the news to their friends, and so on." Snape groaned loudly. "You're not ashamed of me, are you, Severus?"
"No, Remus," Snape said hastily, looking guilty, then saw that Lupin was only teasing him. He sighed. "It's just a bit embarrassing to have my love life being discussed not only among the entire student body, but in the Daily Prophet as well!" Lukas and Lupin laughed. "I'm so happy that I was able to entertain you," he said sarcastically, and the werewolves laughed even harder. He sighed and shook his head. "Taking children hot chocolate in the middle of the night, and now this damned newspaper article, making me out to be either a hero or a lovesick idiot! You have completely ruined my reputation, Lupin!"
"I'm so sorry, Sev," Lupin said, not looking sorry at all. "But I knew all along that you were a softie underneath that big bad Potions Master act."
"LUPIN!"
"Are you two always like this?" Lukas asked, looking amused.
"No," Snape said.
"Yes," Lupin said at the same time.
Lukas chuckled and quietly got up and left the room, leaving Lupin and Snape to happily argue with each other. It was quite some time before they noticed he was gone.
***
Harry reluctantly agreed to give Rita Skeeter an interview, in order to help Lupin and the other werewolves. And Hermione's threat of turning Rita in to the Ministry as an unregistered animagus ensured that she printed his exact words rather than twisting them around. After some inner debate, Harry left out the part about being descended from both Slytherin and Gryffindor; it was bad enough being the Boy Who Lived and the savior of the wizarding world--he could imagine how much more unwanted attention he'd receive if the identity of his ancestors became known. But he did make a point of telling Rita how he had overcome Voldemort by embracing both the Slytherin and Gryffindor qualities within him, and pointed out how the school had united as the Sorting Hat said they should, with students from all four Houses coming together to defend Hogwarts against the Death Eaters. He didn't think he should tell Rita that Snape had taught him Occlumency, since he wasn't sure if Snape wanted that to become common knowledge, but it was Snape who had provided him with the means to defeat Voldemort, so he wanted to give him some credit. So he made sure to mention Snape's role as a spy, and how Snape and the other Order members had protected him over the years, including the time Snape had saved Harry from Quirrell/Voldemort during the Quidditch match in first year.
"So is it true that Severus Snape and Remus Lupin are an item?" Rita asked, peering at him through her jeweled spectacles.
"No comment," Harry said. "You'll have to ask Professor Snape that himself." {I'd like to see you try!} Harry thought to himself, picturing Snape turning Rita into a toad.
From the sour expression on Rita's face, the same thought had probably occurred to her. "You're becoming quite a savvy interviewee, Potter," she said with a hint of grudging respect.
When Snape saw the interview, he scowled ferociously, crumpled up the paper and threw it into the fireplace. Lupin laughed, hugged him, and said, "You'll just have to get used to being a hero, my love!"
***
Most of the teachers didn't try to teach their students much in the last week of school, since everyone was still stunned and distracted by all the uproar and upheaval that followed the battle. Flitwick let them play games and practice spells, Satoshi taught them magic tricks, McGonagall simply reviewed material that would be on their final exams, and most of the other teachers similarly took it easy on their students. The two exceptions were Karasu and Snape, who were both of the opinion that keeping the students too busy to think would distract them from their grief and fear. Snape worked them mercilessly in his Potions classes, allowing them no time to brood or gossip; the Slytherins, although they grumbled under their breath the same as the other students, were troubled by many disturbing thoughts and memories, and were secretly grateful to get a couple of hours' respite from those thoughts. Meanwhile, Karasu worked them equally hard in his martial arts classes; their practice sessions allowed them to work off some of their nervous energy and left them too exhausted to brood or mope. And although they sometimes went to bed bruised and sore, the physical exertion also enabled the students to sleep soundly at night without having their rest interrupted by bad dreams.
Lupin gave his students their exams, as was required by the school, but as he solemnly told his sixth-year Gryffindor-Slytherin class, "As far as I'm concerned, you have already passed the test that truly counts: you took what I taught you and used it on the battlefield to defend the school and your classmates. I'm very proud of all of you." The entire class smiled at him, fairly bursting with pride, even Draco, although his pride was tempered with sorrow.
So aside from the exams, Lupin didn't bother with regular lessons, and spent most of his remaining class sessions simply talking with his students, much as he and Severus had done with the Slytherins the night following the battle. He knew that his students were still confused and a little frightened, and the non-Slytherin students were filled with curiosity about his newly-revealed relationship with the Potions Master.
"You and Professor Snape?" Dean Thomas asked, shaking his head in disbelief. "I still can't believe it! He's so...so..."
The Slytherin students all turned and glared at him, but Lupin intervened before an argument could start. "Stubborn?" Lupin asked gently, an amused smile playing around the corners of his mouth. "Intimidating? Unyielding?"
"Bad-tempered?" muttered Seamus Finnigan.
"Yes, that too," Lupin laughed. Then he said in a quieter and more serious voice, "But all those qualities reflect his inner strength, which enabled him to survive as a spy for almost two decades. It was not an easy job, you know, even aside from the very real and constant danger of being killed--to have to immerse oneself in the role of a Death Eater, to have to pretend to enjoy the killing and torture, to have to live with the suspicion in one's public life, to be feared and despised by one's peers...and one's students." The Gryffindors flushed and looked a bit shamefaced. "I know from experience that he can be...ah...difficult at times, but he has worked very hard to protect all of you. While he does take a sincere pleasure in docking points from Gryffindor, one of the reasons why he would grow so angry with you, Harry, whenever you snuck out of your dorm or the castle on some illicit adventure, was because it made it harder to protect you."
Harry's blush grew deeper as he remembered all the times he had suspected Snape of being in league with Voldemort. "Yes, Professor," he mumbled. "I know that now."
"Okay, so Snape's not a bad guy after all," Seamus said, frowning slightly, with the air of someone trying to figure out a complicated puzzle. "But I still don't understand what made you...ah...um..."
"Fall in love with him?" Lupin finished helpfully with a cheerful smile.
Seamus turned scarlet. Although Pansy had been just as shocked as the Gryffindor boy to learn that Lupin and Snape were lovers, she gave him a condescending smile and said, "You Gryffindors are such prigs."
"I'm not a prig!" Seamus protested, although the sight of his two teachers kissing had thrown him for a loop and made him feel slightly queasy. He didn't think that it was so much the sight of Lupin kissing another man that made him queasy--although he didn't particularly want to see two guys kissing--so much as it was the fact that Lupin had been kissing SNAPE! He could not picture anyone, male or female, wanting to kiss the beaky-nosed, greasy-haired, sallow-faced--not to mention bad-tempered--Potions Master. He shuddered a little as his overactive imagination conjured up an image of Professor McGonagall kissing Snape--no, that definitely was not an improvement! "It's just that he's so...well..." Seamus's voice trailed off; he didn't think that Lupin would appreciate someone calling his lover "ugly."
"Severus has many good points," Lupin said pleasantly. "I would say that he is brave, honorable, and--though he tries to hide it--compassionate, but Professor Snape would accuse me of trying to ruin his reputation if I did."
"Uh, but you did just say it, didn't you, Professor?" Crabbe asked, scratching his head in confusion.
Lupin just grinned and winked at his class, then continued, "Besides, love isn't really logical, as you will no doubt discover for yourself one day, Seamus. You cannot choose who you will fall in love with, but I am very happy that fate brought Severus and I together."
"But he got you fired back in third year!" Dean exclaimed.
"Contrary to what the poets say, love is not always a bed of roses," Lupin said, smiling but looking serious at the same time. "Nor does it mean never having to say you're sorry. In life, friendship, and love, there are always obstacles and misunderstandings." He began walking down the rows between the desks, and paused by Seamus. "One might, for example, believe what they read in the newspaper, and accuse a friend of lying." Seamus flushed and gave Harry an apologetic look, recalling how he had accused Harry of going crazy and lying about Voldemort's return. "But though there were harsh words exchanged, the two friends managed to overcome this misunderstanding and preserve their friendship." He continued walking through the classroom and stopped between Parvati's and Pansy's desks. "Two people might, for example, have been brought up to despise one other, simply because of the Houses they were sorted into. Yet they learned to look beyond appearances and prejudices, and see each other as people, not just as Gryffindors or Slytherins." Parvati, Pansy, Lavender, and Millicent all smiled at each other. "And two teachers," Lupin continued softly, "might someday manage to overcome years of House rivalries and childhood grudges, and learn how to forgive each other." The bell signaling the end of class rang, and Lupin said, "Class dismissed; I'll see you all tomorrow." The students filed out, looking very thoughtful and subdued.
***
The students expected Professor Blackmore to drive them just as hard as Snape did in class, but much to their surprise, she dispensed with her normal lessons, and talked to them much as Lupin had. They were quite curious about her past, although she was evasive about the years in which she had been missing and presumed dead, but she did talk a little about her work as Auror.
"Why did you become a teacher again?" Dean wanted to know. "Isn't being an Auror more exciting?"
"I can live without the excitement, mate," Seamus said fervently.
"There is no glamor, no glory in killing people, Mr. Thomas," Blackmore said quietly, "even in a just cause." Dean fell silent, looking flustered and a little guilty. "No one truly wins a war, no matter which side is proclaimed the victor." Neville nodded, thinking of his parents who had been driven insane by the Death Eaters' torture, and Harry and Draco looked solemn, thinking of their dead parents. "You should have realized this already, Mr. Thomas--you were working in the field hospital, so you saw the dead and wounded firsthand."
"Yes, Professor," Dean mumbled contritely.
"I much prefer nurturing young minds to fighting and killing," Blackmore continued. "I became an Auror because I was needed, but I took no pleasure in it. It broke my heart to face so many of my former students in battle."
"But they were Death Eaters," Dean protested, though in a subdued voice.
"They were also people," Blackmore said, her gaze drifting over to the Slytherins. "Mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, all with people who loved them." Crabbe and Goyle squirmed uncomfortably, and Draco stared down at his desk, unable to meet her eyes. Pansy, Millicent, and Blaise looked at her thoughtfully, while Theodore gave her a wary sidelong glance. "They made bad choices, but they were not all evil."
"You said that they tried to kill you; why don't you hate them?" Ron asked timidly; he was still having trouble adjusting to the fact that things weren't quite as clear-cut as he had always assumed. The Slytherins had fought on their side--including Draco and his cronies, much to Ron's shock, and even two full-fledged Death Eaters, Narcissa Malfoy and Delia Avery, had switched sides in the end. He was no longer sure how he should regard the Slytherins and the repentant Death Eaters.
"I cannot hate them, because I understand the circumstances that made them what they are," Blackmore said softly. "Some of them believed what their families had taught them, that the Muggle-born were a threat to the wizard race, and in their eyes, were simply doing their duty. One young man turned to Voldemort to gain enough power to win his true love's hand in marriage after her family tried to separate them." The students exchanged glances; although Blackmore hadn't mentioned his name, they all knew she was talking about Dylan Rosier's father. "And saddest of all, perhaps, was my old student Lorcan Foley--one of the Death Eaters who tried to kill me. He had been abused by his father, and turned to Voldemort to both escape his father's cruelty and gain revenge on him."
"That doesn't excuse what they did, though," Neville said, thinking again of his parents.
"You're right, Mr. Longbottom," Blackmore said. "It does not. But still...I knew them as children; I watched them grow up. I cannot help but sorrow for them...and to wonder if, as their teacher, I could have offered them better guidance and steered them away from the Death Eaters."
There was an awkward silence, then Hermione said, "I'm sure you did your best, Professor."
Blackmore smiled sadly at her, then said, "And...I cannot judge them. For I have faced temptation myself."
The class stared at her in shock. "Wh-what do you mean?" stammered Neville.
"Voldemort killed my parents," Blackmore said calmly.
"WHAT?!" the class exclaimed. Harry was the only one who was not surprised; Blackmore had told him a little about her father the night he had come to Grimmauld Place to talk to Sirius about the memories he had seen of his father and Snape in the Pensieve. The Slytherins, of course, knew more about pureblood politics and history than the Gryffindors, and Draco said slowly, "I had heard they were killed in an accident..."
"An accident of Voldemort's making," Blackmore said with a bitter smile. "My family had a reputation--not entirely undeserved--for being Dark Wizards, and Voldemort tried to recruit my father, who turned him down. So Voldemort arranged a little 'accident' at my father's research lab: my parents worked as researchers; they studied old books and documents in order to discover spells and potions that had been lost and forgotten through the passage of time, and worked to recreate them and restore that knowledge to the wizarding world. The Ministry investigators ruled that the explosion was an accidental mixing of volatile chemicals by an inexperienced apprentice, but in truth Voldemort was behind it, though no one could prove it." Her students stared at her in stunned silence. "I considered using Dark Magic to exact revenge upon the Death Eaters, but I realized that would make me no better than they were. But still, I was sorely tempted...so you see, I can feel compassion for those who succumbed to temptation, though I cannot condone what they did. Someday you might face similar temptation, and I hope you have the strength to make the right decision. I do not expect you to forgive the Death Eaters; I know that many of you have lost loved ones to them." She glanced at Harry and Neville. "But remember that hatred begets only hatred." She gave both the Gryffindors and Slytherins a hard look. "And remember that the Dark Lord used intolerance and prejudice to rally people to his cause, and do not make the same mistakes that the Death Eaters did."
The girls nodded, their faces a little pale and frightened, but they looked over and smiled at each other, while the boys' faces held varying degrees of confusion, guilt, resentment, and thoughtfulness. Branwen decided that she had given them enough food for thought for one day and dismissed them early. Her students left the classroom with relief; Branwen knew that she had not really eased their troubled thoughts and questions, only replaced them with new ones, but it was her job to teach her students--not to provide them with pat, easy answers. And hopefully some of what she said would sink in, if not now, then someday...
Part 37
In the morning, they had to deal with all the things they had postponed, and were kept busy answering the Ministry's questions and dealing with parents demanding to see their children and wanting to know how Death Eaters had managed to get onto the campus. Somewhat to Snape's surprise, Mrs. Crabbe and Mrs. Goyle were among them, and actually looked relieved to see that their children were safe. He watched in amazement as they hugged their sons, although they had never shown much affection for their children in the past. Would wonders never cease? Delia Avery had finally grown a spine and stood up to her husband; Lupin had won over Draco's loyal cronies; and now Mrs. Crabbe and Mrs. Goyle had turned into loving mothers. Well, while they were annoying and overbearing at times, they had never joined the Death Eaters like their husbands, so perhaps they weren't all that bad, and now that they had nearly lost their their sons, maybe they would appreciate them more. Lupin walked in on the middle of their conversation and cheerfully told them how Crabbe and Goyle had saved him from the Dementor on the battlefield and that they should be very proud of their sons. Snape had to bite his lip to keep from laughing as the two women stared in shock, looking absolutely dumbfounded as their sons beamed happily at their werewolf teacher.
Snape and Lupin were too busy to eat breakfast or lunch in the Great Hall--in fact, they barely had time to eat at all, grabbing a quick bite here and there in between talking to the Ministry officials and fending off worried parents--but they did make it down to the Hall for dinner. Lupin still looked tired and drained, the result of having transformed unexpectedly without the benefit of the Wolfsbane Potion, and he looked up at Snape as they approached the entrance to the Great Hall, an unspoken question in his eyes. Snape knew what Lupin wanted, and he also knew that Lupin would not hold it against him, would not utter one word of rebuke if Snape chose to ignore his silent request. But Lupin looked so weary and so wistful that he could not bear to deny his lover what he wanted. After all, he owed Lupin a great deal for the way he had hurt him in the past, and had he not once promised Lupin, "When the war is over, I will gladly tell the world that you are my lover"? So he silently held his arm out to Lupin as they entered the Hall. Lupin's eyes widened, then he smiled and took Snape's arm, leaning on him for support as they walked in together and took their seats at the head table. All the teachers except for Dumbledore and Branwen stared at them in astonishment, their jaws hanging open. An excited buzz of conversation broke out all over the room from the students' tables.
Lupin grinned at Snape, the weariness in his eyes retreating for a moment to be replaced by a mischievous gleam. "Shall we really give them something to gossip about, Severus?"
"Are you referring to your threat to 'snog you at the head table in front of the entire school,' I believe were your exact words?" Snape asked in his usual sarcastic voice.
"Suh...suh...suh...snog?" gasped a shocked and horrified Hagrid as he overheard Snape's remark. Both Lupin and Snape ignored him.
"Yes, Sev," Lupin replied with a grin.
Snape heaved an exaggerated, long-suffering sigh, and replied, "If you must. Although I think you should learn to curb these exhibitionist tendencies of--"
And the Hall echoed with a great, combined shriek of surprise from the assembled teachers and students as Lupin cut off Snape's words with a firm kiss.
***
When the commotion finally died down, Dumbledore explained to the students the events of the previous night, and praised the bravery of everyone involved, and made a point of noting that they had prevailed because everyone--human and non-human; Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff--had united and worked together for the common good. He raised his glass and said a toast to those who had fought, then asked for a moment of silence for those who had died. He ended his speech on that solemn note, and the meal commenced, in a much more subdued manner.
The Potions Master's pale face remained a little red for the rest of the evening, and he spent most of the meal trying to scowl viciously at the teachers and students who kept casting him sidelong glances of disbelief. But the scowl tended to slip and the corners of his mouth would twitch, threatening to turn into a smile every time he looked at Lupin, who looked radiantly happy and just a little smug. Dumbledore and Branwen, of course, looked EXTREMELY smug and pleased with themselves whenever they looked at the happy couple. Even Sirius, who was sitting at the head table as a guest that night, smiled a little at them. He was not quite sure when he had stopped hating Snape, although he supposed the process had started that day near the end of summer, when he had realized how much Snape cared for Dylan, and when he had finally acknowledged to himself the real reasons he had sent Snape to the Shrieking Shack back in fifth year. He wasn't sure if he and Snape would ever actually be friends, but he supposed that they would learn to get along with each other for Moony's and Branwen's sakes. Branwen adored the slimy git--and Sirius supposed he should be grateful for her capacity for affection, since it also enabled her to love a thick-witted, stubborn, hotheaded Gryffindor git as well. Besides, he had to admit that his main objection to Lupin's and Snape's relationship--his fear that Snape would hurt Remus--no longer applied, because it was clear from that little display of affection that Remy had the Potions Master wrapped around his little finger; he could never in a million years have imagined that Snape would ever let Lupin kiss him and embarrass him in front of the entire school, but he had.
***
Later that night, Snape and Lupin lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. "Sev?" Lupin asked.
"Hmm?"
"Can't sleep?"
"No."
"Me neither. And I imagine there a lot of children lying awake in Slytherin right now, too."
"You're probably right," Snape said.
"Well?" Lupin said expectantly. "Don't you think we should do something about that? You are their Head of House."
"And what would you like me to do, Lupin?" Snape asked sarcastically. "Take them some hot milk, tell them a story, and tuck them into bed?"
"Something like that," Lupin replied with a straight face, "although I was thinking hot chocolate instead of plain milk."
Snape laughed and gave in. "Aren't you worried about the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, and Hufflepuffs as well?"
"Yes, but they have their own Heads of House to look after them," Lupin said, looking serious now. "And besides, it was Slytherin that suffered the most losses in this war. We now have two children who are orphans, two who have lost their fathers, and two whose fathers are back in prison. And many of the others probably have families who sympathized with the Death Eaters. However much they feared the Death Eaters, a part of them must have been drawn to the promise of power, the promise to make Slytherin the greatest of all the Houses, instead of one despised and mistrusted. They will need comfort, Severus, and reassurance."
"Very well," Snape sighed. "But you have to come with me; I'm not very good at comforting children."
"You did well enough with Dylan," Lupin said with a smile. "But of course I'll come with you, since you're not ashamed to be seen with me anymore," Lupin teased.
"I'll have you know, Lupin," Snape complained, "that you're utterly destroying my reputation."
"Poor baby," Lupin said, kissing his cheek.
"Cut that out!"
"You don't want me to kiss you?" Lupin asked innocently.
"I don't want you to call me 'poor baby'!" Snape huffed. "And don't play dumb with me!"
Lupin laughed and hugged him. "I love you when you're grumpy, Sev," he said fondly.
"Well, good," Snape grumbled, "since that's my normal mood."
"I love you all the time, Severus," Lupin said tenderly. "Grumpy or cheerful, compassionate or bitter. I love you always, every part of you."
"Hmmph," Snape snorted as he blushed. Then he kissed Lupin and said, "I love you, too, you irritating little werewolf. Come on, let's go comfort the brats." They climbed out of bed and got dressed, and before they left, Snape paused to put on both his serpent bracelet and the serpent ring Lupin had given him for Christmas.
Lupin smiled when he saw Severus put on the ring, and when he saw that Severus had put the bracelet on over the sleeve of his robe instead of under it. Although he put up with Lupin's "exhibitionist tendencies," Snape was not inclined to be demonstrative with his affection in public, so Lupin was touched by what he knew was Severus's way of openly declaring his love for Lupin.
Snape saw Lupin's smile and said gruffly, "Well, there's no point in hiding it anymore after tonight, is there? Besides, there's not really any need to hide it now that the Dark Lord--now that Voldemort's dead."
Lupin kissed him again, and pulled out the quartz good-luck charm--the first gift he had ever received from Severus, back in fifth year--that he usually wore hidden beneath his robes, and let it rest on his chest. "You're right, Sev; no point in hiding it." He sighed happily. "I've been waiting over twenty years for the chance to wear this openly."
Snape blinked back tears at the sight of the childish gift Lupin had kept and cherished during all the years they'd been apart. He reached out with one finger and traced the rune carved into the smooth surface of the stone; Lupin caught Snape's hand, lifted it to his lips, and kissed his fingertips. Speechless for a moment, Snape let his fingers gently trace the curve of Lupin's lips, then cleared his throat and said, "We should get going." Lupin smiled and nodded.
They made a brief detour to the kitchen, then entered the Slytherin dorm followed by house-elves carrying trays laden with mugs of hot cocoa. Although it was after lights-out, there were a number of children sitting in the common room, looking anxious, haunted, shell-shocked, or all of the above. All of the children who had been on the battlefield were among them.
"Professor!" Dylan exclaimed.
Snape looked as though he didn't know what to say, so Lupin smiled and said, "We couldn't sleep tonight, and clearly you can't, either, so I thought we might as well all stay awake together." The elves began distributing the mugs of cocoa, and soon the rest of the children were coming out into the common room to see what was going on. When all the mugs had been passed out, the house-elves left, and Lupin and Snape took seats on the couch, holding their own mugs. Dylan came over and sat beside Snape, and after a moment, Damien followed. The other children cautiously began to approach; Snape was not surprised to see that most of them congregated around Lupin rather than himself: Theodore and Blaise hesitantly sat on Lupin's side of the couch, and Crabbe, Goyle, and Doherty curled up on the floor at his feet like a pack of puppies. The other children found seats on the floor or on the other chairs. Draco hung back a little, standing in front of the fireplace.
They sipped their chocolate in silence together for a few minutes, then finally Damien worked up enough courage to ask, "Um, sir? When did you and Professor Lupin, ah, um..."
Snape looked over at Lupin. "I'll let you handle that, Lupin, since the public display of affection was your idea," he said in a slightly sarcastic tone.
Lupin just grinned. "Actually, we first got together back in fifth year, during Professor Blackmore's class. She's always been big on inter-House cooperation."
Damien choked on his chocolate. "What?!"
Lupin laughed. "Yes, Dylan's parents weren't the only ones to discover romance in her class!"
"Th-then all these y-years, the two of you...?" Brad Doherty stammered.
Lupin's expression turned sober. "Not exactly. I've always cared for Severus, but..." He and Snape exchanged a significant glance. "But our relationship could not withstand the pressures of the House rivalries. My Gryffindor friends objected to my friendship with Severus and...ah...set into motion a misunderstanding that caused us to quarrel and separate for eighteen years."
"To be fair," Snape admitted reluctantly, "the quarrel was one-sided. You tried to apologize to me, but I would not listen."
"I didn't try hard enough to get you back," Lupin replied, looking a little guilty. "I was too afraid of losing my other friends." He smiled sadly at the Slytherins. "You see, if I lost both Severus and my Gryffindor friends, then I would be completely alone. It's not easy for a werewolf to make friends." He smile grew a little warmer as he added, "At least back then. I'm very happy that so many of you have welcomed me as your teacher in spite of my lycanthropy." He smiled in particular at Crabbe, Goyle, and Brad. "In fact, I owe my life to you three. In all the excitement, I never got a chance to thank you, so I would like to thank you now. Thank you very much, Vincent, Gregory, Brad." The three boys beamed up at him with sheer devotion in their eyes, enhancing Snape's mental image of them as puppies, and he had to duck his head to hide his smile.
Meanwhile, Theodore was busy doing math in his head. "Eighteen years...that means, when you came to Hogwarts during our third year..."
"Very good, Theo," Lupin laughed. "Five points to Slytherin! Yes, Severus and I renewed our...er...friendship...that year."
"But Professor Snape got you fired!" Draco exclaimed.
"Well, there was another, um, misunderstanding," Lupin said.
"Sirius Black," Dylan said quietly. "You believed he really was a murderer, like everyone else did at the time, and you thought Professor Lupin had helped him get into Hogwarts."
"Perceptive as always, Mr. Rosier," Snape sighed. Of course, Dylan was the only one of the children who knew just how much he had hated Black. "But I was wrong. About Black being a murderer, and about Lupin helping him."
"We made up," Lupin explained, "but I still had to leave the school, until Albus convinced the school governors to let me come back this year."
"But you acted like you hated each other!" Goyle said, sounding bewildered.
"Use your brain, you dolt!" Theodore snapped. "A Death Eater couldn't have a relationship with a Gryffindor! They had to pretend..." His voice trailed off as the implication of his own words sank in. "But then...that means..." He looked at his Head of House with wide eyes. "You weren't really a Death Eater!" He asked timidly, "Were...were you ever really one of them, or were you working for Dumbledore the whole time?"
Draco cautiously crept forward; he very much wanted to know the answer to that question, too.
"At first I was," Snape admitted. He really didn't want to confess his shame to his students, but he felt that they deserved to know the truth, particularly the Death Eater offspring; he was quite aware of Draco listening intently behind him. "I wanted to learn all the things about the Dark Arts that Hogwarts refuses to teach, and I wanted revenge on Lupin's Gryffindor friends for humiliating me." He hesitated; well, he had just resolved to tell the truth... "And for coming between us. But on the night I took the Dark Mark, they executed a man before my eyes, killed him in a Blood Magic ritual, and I knew I had gotten in over my head. I told the Headmaster what I had done, and instead of calling in the Aurors to arrest me, he asked me to spy for him, and I agreed."
"To keep from being sent to Azkaban?" Draco demanded.
"No, Draco," Snape replied, without any anger, although most his students were watching him nervously, obviously expecting him to chew out Draco, if not strike him down on the spot. "I feared my Master's wrath far more than I feared prison or even death. I did it to atone for my own stupidity, and my part in that man's death."
"You spied on us all these years," Draco said, still sounding angry and hurt, but there was a pleading look in his eyes. "You pretended to be my father's friend. You pretended to be my friend."
"He was trying to save you, Draco," Lupin said gently.
"Save me from what?!"
"From being served up to the Dark Lord on a platter!" Theodore snarled. "Isn't it obvious? Our precious Master was ready to sacrifice us all last night!"
"I was trying to save you from making the same mistakes I did, Draco," Snape said wearily, "and living with a lifetime of guilt." Draco fell silent. "And I was trying to save you from suffering the fate of Dylan's father, who died for a Master who cared nothing for him. And yes, I was trying to save you from being killed, as Theodore nearly was last night. The Dark Lord claimed we were his family, but he used us like pawns on a chessboard, and sacrificed us just as easily as one would a chess piece. You saw the reward the Lestranges reaped, and they were the most loyal of all his followers."
"I'm sorry," Draco whispered, and he began to tremble a little. "My father told me not to trust you, but he turned out to be the one I couldn't trust."
Lupin reached out to lay a hand on Draco's shoulder. "It's all right, Draco. It's only natural to want to believe in your parents. It's not your fault that your father betrayed your trust."
"Why did you keep trying to help me even when I kept insulting you?" Draco asked him. "Sirius Black said you thought I was worth saving. What made you think that I wouldn't turn out to be like..." He had meant to say, "my dad," but he choked on the words, and changed them to, "...like the other Death Eaters?"
"Because you loved your parents," Lupin answered in a gentle voice. "And someone who is capable of such love cannot be completely evil. Voldemort always thought that love was a weakness, but he was wrong: love is the greatest strength we possess."
Draco sniffled a little and blinked back tears. He abruptly came around to the front of the couch, and joined Crabbe and Goyle on the floor in front of Lupin and Snape. Serafina came over and sat beside him, and he gave her a small, tremulous smile.
Suddenly, the students seemed to have overcome their shock and their fear of Snape, because they were all asking questions at once:
"How did you keep the Death Eaters from finding out you were a spy?"
"Did they ever suspect you, sir?"
"Professor Lupin, what did you do all the time you were gone from Hogwarts?"
"How did you turn into a wolf when it wasn't the full moon?"
"Will you tell us more about your werewolf ancestors?"
"One at a time," Lupin laughed.
So they kept talking late into the night, until all the mugs were empty, and the children were yawning and starting to doze off. Dylan was nodding off on Snape's shoulder, and Crabbe and Goyle were already curled up on the floor, snoring.
"Bedtime," Lupin said softly, and they sent the children off to their rooms. Dylan woke up enough to get back to his room on his own feet, but Crabbe and Goyle were soundly asleep and could not be roused.
"Maybe we should just leave them here," Snape suggested.
"You can't let them sleep on the floor!" Lupin said indignantly.
"Oh, very well," Snape sighed. He took out his wand and levitated them to their room. "But you can tuck them into bed, since it was your idea!"
"Very well," Lupin said with a smile, and he did.
***
Things were very hectic in the following week; the Minister of Magic was dead, and a new Minister needed to be selected. The position was offered to Dumbledore, who turned it down, of course, but suggested an alternate candidate: Arthur Weasley. The Ministry officials were shocked by this, but the Aurors who had fought on the battlefield had been impressed by Arthur's courage as he had fought alongside them, and by the way he had kept his head afterwards, calmly and efficiently overseeing the roundup of the prisoners and the evacuation of the wounded. So a stunned Arthur Weasley found himself the new Minister of Magic; he was a bit overwhelmed and tempted to turn down the position, but the look of pride on his wife's and children's faces made him change his mind. He didn't care about the rank or the increase in pay, but things had been difficult for Molly over the years, and he wanted to make it up to her. Besides, as Dumbledore pointed out to him, he would be in a position to do some good in the wizarding world.
Even before Arthur was appointed the new Minister of Magic, Percy made peace with his family. He finally understood that his father had been right all along about Harry Potter and Voldemort, and he was touched by the way the twins had rushed to his rescue, nearly getting themselves killed in the process. And his brothers and sister forgave him for the way he had snubbed them the other year, impressed by the way he had fought off an Imperius Curse to set off the firecracker warning. Fred and George were quite pleased that their new fireworks had been used as a warning signal--and by the fact that it provided some positive publicity for their shop. Molly, of course, was simply relieved and overjoyed to have her family together again.
The Longbottom family also had a happy reunion: Neville's parents were suddenly thinking and speaking coherently again--perhaps the result of the deaths of Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange. Often the effects of a curse were broken by the death of the caster, the way the Dark Mark had vanished from the arms of the Death Eaters after Voldemort died. The Longbottoms remembered almost nothing that happened after the attack; the past fifteen years they had spent in St. Mungo's were a blur to them, so they were more than a little surprised to find that their baby boy was now a teenager, but they embraced him with tears of sorrow and joy.
The surviving Death Eaters were sentenced to prison terms in Azkaban, except for Narcissa Malfoy and Delia Avery, who were granted probation because they had fought against their fellow Death Eaters in the end. That was a relief to Snape, who already had two orphaned Slytherins to worry about; Dylan had Math and Goewin, of course, but he wasn't sure if Theodore Nott had any relatives who were willing to look after him, or if those relatives were people who could be entrusted with a child's care. Rabastan Lestrange was still at large, and the Aurors were hunting for him, but no one considered him that much of a threat now that Voldemort was dead and all the other Death Eaters were imprisoned.
Meanwhile, the giants signed a peace treaty with the wizards. There was some grumbling about that, but Dumbledore pointed out that the new Gurg, Grawp, had saved the lives of Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and the grumbling ceased, or at least was toned down to a mutter. The centaurs still wanted nothing to do with the humans; they had fought simply to avenge their slain kinsfolk, they said haughtily, and retreated back to the Forest. They accepted Firenze back into their ranks, though, and the centaur resigned his position at Hogwarts, leaving Professor Trelawney the sole Divination teacher once again. Snape muttered that they ought to look into hiring Miyako Kamiyama when she graduated from school; she certainly had a higher success rate than Trelawney.
The new Minister of Magic also pushed through a new law giving non-humans equal rights. This was accomplished with some help from Rita Skeeter, who wrote up a glowing account of how the werewolves had "fought heroically, risking their lives to aid the very people who had treated them as outcasts and second-class citizens."
"Well, actually, we just wanted to avenge the death of our friend," Lukas said with an amused smile as he read the Daily Prophet one morning; Lupin had invited him to Hogwarts to give him the good news, and they were having breakfast together in Snape's quarters--well, Lupin's and Snape's quarters now. After having gone public with their relationship, there didn't seem to be any point in Lupin keeping his own rooms, since he spent nearly all of his time in Snape's. So he happily and openly moved into Snape's dungeon quarters. The Slytherin children were delighted to have him in the dungeon; in their eyes, it served to make him one of their own, a sort of unofficial Slytherin even though he was a Gryffindor. Lupin looked around the room which was now truly his, and at his lover, who was sipping a cup of coffee with a rather sour expression on his face, and was filled with a sense of contentment. It took him a moment to realize that Lukas was speaking, and he had not heard a word that his friend had said.
"Earth to Remus," Lukas said, waving a hand in front of his face.
"Oh, sorry!" Lupin said. "I was just...er...ruminating, I suppose."
Lukas grinned, giving Lupin a sly look. "You looked as smug as a cat licking cream from its whiskers! Anyway, what I said was, how on earth did you get the Skeeter woman to give us a positive write-up? Her style is more tearing people down than building them up."
Lupin grinned. "It wasn't me; it was Hermione. She arranged for Rita to get an exclusive interview with Harry in exchange for a few articles like this one. She also seems to have some kind of hold over the woman that I don't quite understand, almost as if she's blackmailing Rita."
"Hmm," Snape said thoughtfully, "she's not as much of a goody-two-shoes as I thought. Maybe she would have made a good Slytherin after all..."
"There's a sidebar here about the Wolfsbane Potion," Lukas said. "All about how werewolves are perfectly safe when they take it, and apparently the Ministry is expanding the distribution program--thanks to Arthur, no doubt." Then his eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You helped invent the potion, Snape?! I didn't know that!"
"What?!" Snape exclaimed. "Did that little brat tell the Skeeter woman that?!"
"No," Lukas said, reading further. "It was your partner, Kamiyama. He says that he felt guilty about taking the credit for it all these years, and he wanted to see you get the acknowledgment you deserve." Lukas grinned, exposing his sharp canines. "He makes you out to be quite the hero, Severus. He says you kept your role in the development of the Wolfsbane Potion secret so as not to jeopardize your ability to spy on the Death Eaters."
"Meddling old wizards," Snape mumbled as he flushed slightly.
"You ARE a hero, Sev," Lupin said, kissing him on the cheek. "I think the whole world should know that!"
Snape's face turned even more red as he glared at Lupin for kissing him in front of the other werewolf. "Most people probably think I only turned on Voldemort to save my own skin."
"Well, this article hints that you developed the potion out of affection for a certain werewolf," Lukas said, still grinning.
"WHAT?!" Snape howled. "Who told her that?! It must be one of the students! When I find out which brat it was, I'll--"
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Severus," Lupin interrupted, "I'm sure half the wizarding world must know by now. After we kissed at the head table--"
"You kissed me," Snape corrected him.
"--I'm sure many of the students owled their parents with the shocking news," Lupin continued calmly. "And they in turn spread the news to their friends, and so on." Snape groaned loudly. "You're not ashamed of me, are you, Severus?"
"No, Remus," Snape said hastily, looking guilty, then saw that Lupin was only teasing him. He sighed. "It's just a bit embarrassing to have my love life being discussed not only among the entire student body, but in the Daily Prophet as well!" Lukas and Lupin laughed. "I'm so happy that I was able to entertain you," he said sarcastically, and the werewolves laughed even harder. He sighed and shook his head. "Taking children hot chocolate in the middle of the night, and now this damned newspaper article, making me out to be either a hero or a lovesick idiot! You have completely ruined my reputation, Lupin!"
"I'm so sorry, Sev," Lupin said, not looking sorry at all. "But I knew all along that you were a softie underneath that big bad Potions Master act."
"LUPIN!"
"Are you two always like this?" Lukas asked, looking amused.
"No," Snape said.
"Yes," Lupin said at the same time.
Lukas chuckled and quietly got up and left the room, leaving Lupin and Snape to happily argue with each other. It was quite some time before they noticed he was gone.
***
Harry reluctantly agreed to give Rita Skeeter an interview, in order to help Lupin and the other werewolves. And Hermione's threat of turning Rita in to the Ministry as an unregistered animagus ensured that she printed his exact words rather than twisting them around. After some inner debate, Harry left out the part about being descended from both Slytherin and Gryffindor; it was bad enough being the Boy Who Lived and the savior of the wizarding world--he could imagine how much more unwanted attention he'd receive if the identity of his ancestors became known. But he did make a point of telling Rita how he had overcome Voldemort by embracing both the Slytherin and Gryffindor qualities within him, and pointed out how the school had united as the Sorting Hat said they should, with students from all four Houses coming together to defend Hogwarts against the Death Eaters. He didn't think he should tell Rita that Snape had taught him Occlumency, since he wasn't sure if Snape wanted that to become common knowledge, but it was Snape who had provided him with the means to defeat Voldemort, so he wanted to give him some credit. So he made sure to mention Snape's role as a spy, and how Snape and the other Order members had protected him over the years, including the time Snape had saved Harry from Quirrell/Voldemort during the Quidditch match in first year.
"So is it true that Severus Snape and Remus Lupin are an item?" Rita asked, peering at him through her jeweled spectacles.
"No comment," Harry said. "You'll have to ask Professor Snape that himself." {I'd like to see you try!} Harry thought to himself, picturing Snape turning Rita into a toad.
From the sour expression on Rita's face, the same thought had probably occurred to her. "You're becoming quite a savvy interviewee, Potter," she said with a hint of grudging respect.
When Snape saw the interview, he scowled ferociously, crumpled up the paper and threw it into the fireplace. Lupin laughed, hugged him, and said, "You'll just have to get used to being a hero, my love!"
***
Most of the teachers didn't try to teach their students much in the last week of school, since everyone was still stunned and distracted by all the uproar and upheaval that followed the battle. Flitwick let them play games and practice spells, Satoshi taught them magic tricks, McGonagall simply reviewed material that would be on their final exams, and most of the other teachers similarly took it easy on their students. The two exceptions were Karasu and Snape, who were both of the opinion that keeping the students too busy to think would distract them from their grief and fear. Snape worked them mercilessly in his Potions classes, allowing them no time to brood or gossip; the Slytherins, although they grumbled under their breath the same as the other students, were troubled by many disturbing thoughts and memories, and were secretly grateful to get a couple of hours' respite from those thoughts. Meanwhile, Karasu worked them equally hard in his martial arts classes; their practice sessions allowed them to work off some of their nervous energy and left them too exhausted to brood or mope. And although they sometimes went to bed bruised and sore, the physical exertion also enabled the students to sleep soundly at night without having their rest interrupted by bad dreams.
Lupin gave his students their exams, as was required by the school, but as he solemnly told his sixth-year Gryffindor-Slytherin class, "As far as I'm concerned, you have already passed the test that truly counts: you took what I taught you and used it on the battlefield to defend the school and your classmates. I'm very proud of all of you." The entire class smiled at him, fairly bursting with pride, even Draco, although his pride was tempered with sorrow.
So aside from the exams, Lupin didn't bother with regular lessons, and spent most of his remaining class sessions simply talking with his students, much as he and Severus had done with the Slytherins the night following the battle. He knew that his students were still confused and a little frightened, and the non-Slytherin students were filled with curiosity about his newly-revealed relationship with the Potions Master.
"You and Professor Snape?" Dean Thomas asked, shaking his head in disbelief. "I still can't believe it! He's so...so..."
The Slytherin students all turned and glared at him, but Lupin intervened before an argument could start. "Stubborn?" Lupin asked gently, an amused smile playing around the corners of his mouth. "Intimidating? Unyielding?"
"Bad-tempered?" muttered Seamus Finnigan.
"Yes, that too," Lupin laughed. Then he said in a quieter and more serious voice, "But all those qualities reflect his inner strength, which enabled him to survive as a spy for almost two decades. It was not an easy job, you know, even aside from the very real and constant danger of being killed--to have to immerse oneself in the role of a Death Eater, to have to pretend to enjoy the killing and torture, to have to live with the suspicion in one's public life, to be feared and despised by one's peers...and one's students." The Gryffindors flushed and looked a bit shamefaced. "I know from experience that he can be...ah...difficult at times, but he has worked very hard to protect all of you. While he does take a sincere pleasure in docking points from Gryffindor, one of the reasons why he would grow so angry with you, Harry, whenever you snuck out of your dorm or the castle on some illicit adventure, was because it made it harder to protect you."
Harry's blush grew deeper as he remembered all the times he had suspected Snape of being in league with Voldemort. "Yes, Professor," he mumbled. "I know that now."
"Okay, so Snape's not a bad guy after all," Seamus said, frowning slightly, with the air of someone trying to figure out a complicated puzzle. "But I still don't understand what made you...ah...um..."
"Fall in love with him?" Lupin finished helpfully with a cheerful smile.
Seamus turned scarlet. Although Pansy had been just as shocked as the Gryffindor boy to learn that Lupin and Snape were lovers, she gave him a condescending smile and said, "You Gryffindors are such prigs."
"I'm not a prig!" Seamus protested, although the sight of his two teachers kissing had thrown him for a loop and made him feel slightly queasy. He didn't think that it was so much the sight of Lupin kissing another man that made him queasy--although he didn't particularly want to see two guys kissing--so much as it was the fact that Lupin had been kissing SNAPE! He could not picture anyone, male or female, wanting to kiss the beaky-nosed, greasy-haired, sallow-faced--not to mention bad-tempered--Potions Master. He shuddered a little as his overactive imagination conjured up an image of Professor McGonagall kissing Snape--no, that definitely was not an improvement! "It's just that he's so...well..." Seamus's voice trailed off; he didn't think that Lupin would appreciate someone calling his lover "ugly."
"Severus has many good points," Lupin said pleasantly. "I would say that he is brave, honorable, and--though he tries to hide it--compassionate, but Professor Snape would accuse me of trying to ruin his reputation if I did."
"Uh, but you did just say it, didn't you, Professor?" Crabbe asked, scratching his head in confusion.
Lupin just grinned and winked at his class, then continued, "Besides, love isn't really logical, as you will no doubt discover for yourself one day, Seamus. You cannot choose who you will fall in love with, but I am very happy that fate brought Severus and I together."
"But he got you fired back in third year!" Dean exclaimed.
"Contrary to what the poets say, love is not always a bed of roses," Lupin said, smiling but looking serious at the same time. "Nor does it mean never having to say you're sorry. In life, friendship, and love, there are always obstacles and misunderstandings." He began walking down the rows between the desks, and paused by Seamus. "One might, for example, believe what they read in the newspaper, and accuse a friend of lying." Seamus flushed and gave Harry an apologetic look, recalling how he had accused Harry of going crazy and lying about Voldemort's return. "But though there were harsh words exchanged, the two friends managed to overcome this misunderstanding and preserve their friendship." He continued walking through the classroom and stopped between Parvati's and Pansy's desks. "Two people might, for example, have been brought up to despise one other, simply because of the Houses they were sorted into. Yet they learned to look beyond appearances and prejudices, and see each other as people, not just as Gryffindors or Slytherins." Parvati, Pansy, Lavender, and Millicent all smiled at each other. "And two teachers," Lupin continued softly, "might someday manage to overcome years of House rivalries and childhood grudges, and learn how to forgive each other." The bell signaling the end of class rang, and Lupin said, "Class dismissed; I'll see you all tomorrow." The students filed out, looking very thoughtful and subdued.
***
The students expected Professor Blackmore to drive them just as hard as Snape did in class, but much to their surprise, she dispensed with her normal lessons, and talked to them much as Lupin had. They were quite curious about her past, although she was evasive about the years in which she had been missing and presumed dead, but she did talk a little about her work as Auror.
"Why did you become a teacher again?" Dean wanted to know. "Isn't being an Auror more exciting?"
"I can live without the excitement, mate," Seamus said fervently.
"There is no glamor, no glory in killing people, Mr. Thomas," Blackmore said quietly, "even in a just cause." Dean fell silent, looking flustered and a little guilty. "No one truly wins a war, no matter which side is proclaimed the victor." Neville nodded, thinking of his parents who had been driven insane by the Death Eaters' torture, and Harry and Draco looked solemn, thinking of their dead parents. "You should have realized this already, Mr. Thomas--you were working in the field hospital, so you saw the dead and wounded firsthand."
"Yes, Professor," Dean mumbled contritely.
"I much prefer nurturing young minds to fighting and killing," Blackmore continued. "I became an Auror because I was needed, but I took no pleasure in it. It broke my heart to face so many of my former students in battle."
"But they were Death Eaters," Dean protested, though in a subdued voice.
"They were also people," Blackmore said, her gaze drifting over to the Slytherins. "Mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, all with people who loved them." Crabbe and Goyle squirmed uncomfortably, and Draco stared down at his desk, unable to meet her eyes. Pansy, Millicent, and Blaise looked at her thoughtfully, while Theodore gave her a wary sidelong glance. "They made bad choices, but they were not all evil."
"You said that they tried to kill you; why don't you hate them?" Ron asked timidly; he was still having trouble adjusting to the fact that things weren't quite as clear-cut as he had always assumed. The Slytherins had fought on their side--including Draco and his cronies, much to Ron's shock, and even two full-fledged Death Eaters, Narcissa Malfoy and Delia Avery, had switched sides in the end. He was no longer sure how he should regard the Slytherins and the repentant Death Eaters.
"I cannot hate them, because I understand the circumstances that made them what they are," Blackmore said softly. "Some of them believed what their families had taught them, that the Muggle-born were a threat to the wizard race, and in their eyes, were simply doing their duty. One young man turned to Voldemort to gain enough power to win his true love's hand in marriage after her family tried to separate them." The students exchanged glances; although Blackmore hadn't mentioned his name, they all knew she was talking about Dylan Rosier's father. "And saddest of all, perhaps, was my old student Lorcan Foley--one of the Death Eaters who tried to kill me. He had been abused by his father, and turned to Voldemort to both escape his father's cruelty and gain revenge on him."
"That doesn't excuse what they did, though," Neville said, thinking again of his parents.
"You're right, Mr. Longbottom," Blackmore said. "It does not. But still...I knew them as children; I watched them grow up. I cannot help but sorrow for them...and to wonder if, as their teacher, I could have offered them better guidance and steered them away from the Death Eaters."
There was an awkward silence, then Hermione said, "I'm sure you did your best, Professor."
Blackmore smiled sadly at her, then said, "And...I cannot judge them. For I have faced temptation myself."
The class stared at her in shock. "Wh-what do you mean?" stammered Neville.
"Voldemort killed my parents," Blackmore said calmly.
"WHAT?!" the class exclaimed. Harry was the only one who was not surprised; Blackmore had told him a little about her father the night he had come to Grimmauld Place to talk to Sirius about the memories he had seen of his father and Snape in the Pensieve. The Slytherins, of course, knew more about pureblood politics and history than the Gryffindors, and Draco said slowly, "I had heard they were killed in an accident..."
"An accident of Voldemort's making," Blackmore said with a bitter smile. "My family had a reputation--not entirely undeserved--for being Dark Wizards, and Voldemort tried to recruit my father, who turned him down. So Voldemort arranged a little 'accident' at my father's research lab: my parents worked as researchers; they studied old books and documents in order to discover spells and potions that had been lost and forgotten through the passage of time, and worked to recreate them and restore that knowledge to the wizarding world. The Ministry investigators ruled that the explosion was an accidental mixing of volatile chemicals by an inexperienced apprentice, but in truth Voldemort was behind it, though no one could prove it." Her students stared at her in stunned silence. "I considered using Dark Magic to exact revenge upon the Death Eaters, but I realized that would make me no better than they were. But still, I was sorely tempted...so you see, I can feel compassion for those who succumbed to temptation, though I cannot condone what they did. Someday you might face similar temptation, and I hope you have the strength to make the right decision. I do not expect you to forgive the Death Eaters; I know that many of you have lost loved ones to them." She glanced at Harry and Neville. "But remember that hatred begets only hatred." She gave both the Gryffindors and Slytherins a hard look. "And remember that the Dark Lord used intolerance and prejudice to rally people to his cause, and do not make the same mistakes that the Death Eaters did."
The girls nodded, their faces a little pale and frightened, but they looked over and smiled at each other, while the boys' faces held varying degrees of confusion, guilt, resentment, and thoughtfulness. Branwen decided that she had given them enough food for thought for one day and dismissed them early. Her students left the classroom with relief; Branwen knew that she had not really eased their troubled thoughts and questions, only replaced them with new ones, but it was her job to teach her students--not to provide them with pat, easy answers. And hopefully some of what she said would sink in, if not now, then someday...
Part 37